I am so impatient. I have noticed that when Abby or Ellie "flounders" to understand a concept...I am so irritated. I know that this has more to do with me than them. I know that I if I were teaching it in a creative way that they could resonate with then the problem would be eliminated. I also know that I am not Wonder Woman. i mean, honestly, some of my frustration is because of their laziness. I am having to be a wall right now. "Do not pass go. Do not collect $25." There are concepts that we are reviewing that should not be as difficult to them- if they would apply themselves. I am having to remember that they are young and that I am the one who volunteered for this. Getting irritated with them accomplishes absolutely nothing. In fact it produces what I do not want. I have to think on their level and try to imagine how they are hearing what I am saying.
In homeschooling, much like adoption, and parenting in general, I get downwind of myself almost daily. My heart is on display with every word that falls from my mouth. When the girls are scrapping Greg is really great at stopping them and saying, "Did you just say that she made you do that?? She didn't make you do anything. You responded out of the overflow of your heart." Wow. Could you not say that again?
Being a parent, homeschooling, dealing with life, a dog, a house that is always in need of re-pair- May all of this reveal a heart that is worshiping and grace filled!
Tuesday, August 31, 2010
Sunday, August 22, 2010
Loosing Me
The most difficult transition for me, concerning parenthood, over the past twelve years has been loosing myself. I have noticed that I have become a very un-opinionated individual concerning "stuff". I really do not care a whole lot anymore about where we eat, if I get to buy a new pair of Tom's or if we watch Discovery or NatGeo. (Now, music is an entirely different subject!) I think that I, concerning our family, am learning slowly but surely, how to let go.
When Abby was 2 1/2 and Ellie was about 4 months, I got a job. "I needed a job so that I felt like I was accomplishing something." It is really comical to me to read that statement now, however, then it was survival. I remember telling Greg that I didn't feel as if I could accomplish one task all day - that I wouldn't have to turn right around and re-do due to the precious 2 year old. So I got a job at Starbucks and believe me, I felt great pride in taking the trash out there, cleaning the store and making drinks that seemed like gold to the customer.
Now, I am busy all day- re-doing what I did the day before. I am washing all of the time. Picking up plates, re-filling milk cups & picking up wet towels. I am building,however, one block at a time, one day at a time, one encouraging word, one "good job", one pat at a time. I have learned that in loosing me I am finding me.
I think that at the beginning of every school year I have to re-focus. I have to preach the Gospel to myself. I must re-new my mind and my will. I am seeing though, by God's grace, what I was unable to see before. My grandchildren need me now, to pour into their mom's. My future son-in-laws are relying on me to train, mold, indoctrinate and teach-how-to-follow, their future wives. I have felt, and now more than ever, the weight of this God-given purpose.
When Abby was 2 1/2 and Ellie was about 4 months, I got a job. "I needed a job so that I felt like I was accomplishing something." It is really comical to me to read that statement now, however, then it was survival. I remember telling Greg that I didn't feel as if I could accomplish one task all day - that I wouldn't have to turn right around and re-do due to the precious 2 year old. So I got a job at Starbucks and believe me, I felt great pride in taking the trash out there, cleaning the store and making drinks that seemed like gold to the customer.
Now, I am busy all day- re-doing what I did the day before. I am washing all of the time. Picking up plates, re-filling milk cups & picking up wet towels. I am building,however, one block at a time, one day at a time, one encouraging word, one "good job", one pat at a time. I have learned that in loosing me I am finding me.
I think that at the beginning of every school year I have to re-focus. I have to preach the Gospel to myself. I must re-new my mind and my will. I am seeing though, by God's grace, what I was unable to see before. My grandchildren need me now, to pour into their mom's. My future son-in-laws are relying on me to train, mold, indoctrinate and teach-how-to-follow, their future wives. I have felt, and now more than ever, the weight of this God-given purpose.
Saturday, July 31, 2010
Raising Global Christ Followers
Read this on my brother's blog-
http://disqus.com/forums/kylegoenblog/raising_global_christ_followers_pt2/trackback/
http://disqus.com/forums/kylegoenblog/raising_global_christ_followers_pt2/trackback/
Thursday, July 22, 2010
Saturday, July 17, 2010
PRICELESS: A Novel on the Edge of the World
So i have been postponing this review in an attempt to get the book back in my hands. The day that i finished my friend, Shannon, who was leaving for vacation called and asked if i would leave the book on my porch for her to pick up. The day that i got the book back- my great aunt, who is 79, took the book to read because she had heard my ranting about it! so- i do not have the book in my possession at this time...HOWEVER, i will REVIEW!
Let me begin by saying that Tom Davis is a phenomenal story teller. I am not easily captivated. i find that i am an easily distracted, mind wandering, Mother of 4. I hate that this consumeristic, entertainment, novel world has shaped me as much as it has. However,this is where his ability to capture the reader comes in. He has a powerful ability to arrest the reader and transport them to a world that is completely foreign. He waste no time and uses no unnecessary explanations or descriptions.
To say that this book is fast-paced is an understatement. It is a dark, suspenseful ride.
The character development is great. Presently i am reading a book that has multiple stories, involving numerous characters and I must say keeping them straight has been laborious. Priceless is the opposite. This work is focused and clear. From the beginning I was intrigued by the accusation that the Church was somehow instrumental in the trading of these young girls for prostitution and slavery. There were times that i was sickened by the underworld of those who should be "rescuing the perishing."
The thing that I appreciate the most about Tom's writing is the capacity that he has to connect the reader with the character. I loved the weaknesses that he exposes in the main character, Stuart Daniels. From the minute this married man reconnects with his Russian contact and ex-girl friend he is aware of his attraction to her. I love that he is faithful to his wife. I love that Stuart is a fringe church member. And that the church where is beginning to re-connect is not one that is considered modern evangelical. Tom is an author that I believe understands his audience- which in turn tells me that he understands people.
This book, as well as Fields of the Fatherless, that he authored and i read last year , truly motivated me. I feel like a dweeb in saying that "they made me want to be more involved" and "i want to help the hurting." So i won't say that. His books make me want to help one person. He rattles my benevolence grid and pushes me to stop seeing wrecked lives as $50 projects. I feel like I have the ability and the resolve to live wholeheartedly for myself. I have the will and fortitude to loose myself in me and all that reminds me of me. Mr. Davis has a way of pressing the pause button on my self indulgent world. Reading his work is like sitting down to a fabulous meal, with fabulous drinks, in a fabulous place, with all of my fabulous people surrounding me and the minute that i am about to engage in my fabulous first bite i make eye contact with the lonely and distraught, orphan prostitute who misses her mom and just needs to borrow my iPhone long enough to call home. His writing reminds me that i must take a step. i must engage with a world that has gone absolutely crazy. when i look into the eyes of the hurting i must see my children, my mother and my brother.
Let me begin by saying that Tom Davis is a phenomenal story teller. I am not easily captivated. i find that i am an easily distracted, mind wandering, Mother of 4. I hate that this consumeristic, entertainment, novel world has shaped me as much as it has. However,this is where his ability to capture the reader comes in. He has a powerful ability to arrest the reader and transport them to a world that is completely foreign. He waste no time and uses no unnecessary explanations or descriptions.
To say that this book is fast-paced is an understatement. It is a dark, suspenseful ride.
The character development is great. Presently i am reading a book that has multiple stories, involving numerous characters and I must say keeping them straight has been laborious. Priceless is the opposite. This work is focused and clear. From the beginning I was intrigued by the accusation that the Church was somehow instrumental in the trading of these young girls for prostitution and slavery. There were times that i was sickened by the underworld of those who should be "rescuing the perishing."
The thing that I appreciate the most about Tom's writing is the capacity that he has to connect the reader with the character. I loved the weaknesses that he exposes in the main character, Stuart Daniels. From the minute this married man reconnects with his Russian contact and ex-girl friend he is aware of his attraction to her. I love that he is faithful to his wife. I love that Stuart is a fringe church member. And that the church where is beginning to re-connect is not one that is considered modern evangelical. Tom is an author that I believe understands his audience- which in turn tells me that he understands people.
This book, as well as Fields of the Fatherless, that he authored and i read last year , truly motivated me. I feel like a dweeb in saying that "they made me want to be more involved" and "i want to help the hurting." So i won't say that. His books make me want to help one person. He rattles my benevolence grid and pushes me to stop seeing wrecked lives as $50 projects. I feel like I have the ability and the resolve to live wholeheartedly for myself. I have the will and fortitude to loose myself in me and all that reminds me of me. Mr. Davis has a way of pressing the pause button on my self indulgent world. Reading his work is like sitting down to a fabulous meal, with fabulous drinks, in a fabulous place, with all of my fabulous people surrounding me and the minute that i am about to engage in my fabulous first bite i make eye contact with the lonely and distraught, orphan prostitute who misses her mom and just needs to borrow my iPhone long enough to call home. His writing reminds me that i must take a step. i must engage with a world that has gone absolutely crazy. when i look into the eyes of the hurting i must see my children, my mother and my brother.
Wednesday, June 30, 2010
Tuesday, June 8, 2010
I won't belabor the point...
If someone has children who do not obey and they home school- the issue is not home schooling. The child is disobedient. Maybe the parents are not in control of their children or the child might have a problem that you are unaware of - whatever the case might be - it is a heart issue. What if this child is disobedient at home, however, in the school classroom he/she acts fine & orderly? There is a problem that needs to be addressed. PLEASE stop blaming home education. Sometimes, the problems cease when the child is brought home because the parent is forced to deal with the sin in order to educate their son/daughter. When someone says, "I could never home school Blair because she would argue with me the entire time." There is an issue that needs to be confronted. WHY does Blair argue with the authority that God has placed in her life? WHY not use these opportunities to make Blair look at her own heart and listen to your voice. WHY? Because it is difficult. Are there other scenarios in which these authority lessons can be learned? Sure. However, there is something different that happens in these lessons. So, PLEASE do not blame an entire system of education on bad parenting or misplaced worship. I will not do this to the form of education that you have chosen for your child. Thank you.
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