Friday, February 19, 2010

Family




We were so glad to have some of Greg's family in for Ellie's B-day. Their generosity and the ease of the conversation was a real blessing to us. Glad they're back in the USA and looking forward to more visits in the future.
PS- I didn't get one pic of Greg's mom- sorry June! :(

Wednesday, February 17, 2010

Today consisted of...





Today was my first day back, after a two year break, to homeschooling. Ellie, my 8 year old, began again today. Abby, my 10 year old, will begin again at the first of March. I have missed them and I am glad to have the time with them again. Today fit like a glove. It is amazing how easy it felt and how much laughing there was in the house. Much more relaxed again - yet all of our school work complete. What an unexplainable feeling to sit down for dinner again and not have to hurry. Ellie sat down with Greg tonight to show him everything that she had accomplished and was so happy that she had completed it by noon. We walked to a park down the street after lunch where we played for about 45 minutes...it was SO stinkin' cold! The kids did not mind a bit. On the walk home they had a blast filling their pockets full of pecans. They are all over the sidewalks. After we got home, we read a couple of small books, did laundry and then we went to pick up my great aunt.
Miss Bea, who is 79 years old, lives with my mom. And she has done a great job having her in her home. This year I made the connection, for the first time, why James categorizes orphans & widows together..."in their distress". There are so many observable similarities b/t foster children and the elderly - to list them would take days. Voicelessness, Nameless, Helpless, Isolated, Alone, Feelings of Hopelessness, Despairing...the list goes on. One of the few times, however, that I see true, raw, happiness is when Miss Bea is with my children. They are really great with her & she engages with them. Today they reminded her over & over again how to play UNO, and they were very patient every single time she played the wrong color & played when it wasn't her turn. We made Chicken Pot Pie- it was a vote that was decided upon by her! And Little Zoe climbed all over her, acting like a puppy, sniffing her face, kissing her and barking at her. Miss Bea even let Zoe tie a "collar" onto her! I am convinced more and more everyday for the need of community. There are lots of people in our house to "absorb" some of the "nuances" that come with being old! (& that also come with being an ex-foster child with r.a.d.!) It was really a great day. Now, I am beat. I am ready to climb into my warm bed, pray a prayer of thanksgiving and drift away to my "crazy world of dreams".

Don't forget- Feb. 17 is Random Acts of Kindness Day! ;)

Monday, February 15, 2010

Soccer



As a family of six, four of those being children, we have to have a plan when it comes to organized sports. This season Ellie is playing. Her games start this month and today she had her first practice. She did a great job. I have to say that she did not complain one time and it was f.r.e.e.z.i.n.g.! On the way to practice she said, "Man, I'm glad that we didn't have school today or I would've not wanted to come to practice." They start at 5:30 and we are usually settled in having dinner- so she knows herself pretty well. :) She must take after me because once I am in for the night...I like to be in for the night. Hopefully the early morning games will prove to be something that she likes. We'll see!

Friday, February 12, 2010

Thursday, February 11, 2010

Wednesday, February 10, 2010

Thanks for asking.




Below is a list of charachteristics that somewhat "define" children living with RAD. Reactive Attachment Disorder. RAD arises from a failure to form normal attachments to primary caregivers in early childhood. Kids will not display all of these at once, necessarily, and to greater or lesser degrees. Remember to pray for parents who are raising children with Reactive Attachment Disorder. Pray that the Lord will right the wrongs that have been done to these little blessings. And please be patient & gracious with these tired parents by not assuming that these are "disobedience" issues. Remember, "Let us all be slow to speak"...most of the parents who have chosen to adopt have walked into it soberly- with an open-stance toward their child. They ARE reading, praying, educating themselves, becoming students of their children. Adoption is messy. The Christian life is messy. What should our attitude be? "Consider it pure joy brothers when you face trials of many kinds..." Let us "hold unswervingly to the faith that we posses." Kids can grow "through" this. I was thinking yesterday about how far we have come. Our child can control herself through church now...she can stay in bed...she can make eye contact. Press on!

Childhood Symptoms of Reactive Attachment Disorder
*Superficially charming and engaging, particularly around strangers or those who they feel they can manipulate

*Indiscriminate affection, often to strangers; but not affectionate on parent's terms

*Problems making eye contact, except when angry or lying

*A severe need to control everything and everyone, worsens as child gets older

*Hyper vigilant

*Hyperactive, yet lazy in performing tasks

*Argumentative, often over silly or insignificant things

*Frequent tantrums or rage, often over trivial issues

*Demanding or clingy, often at inappropriate times

*Trouble understanding cause and effect

*Poor impulse control

*Lacks morals and values

*Little or no empathy; often have not developed a conscience

*Cruelty to animals

*Lying for no apparent reason

*False allegations of abuse

*Destructive to property or self

*Stealing

*Constant chatter, nonsense questions

*Abnormal speech patterns

*Developmental/learning delays

*Fascination with fire/blood/gore; will usually make the bad choice

*Problems with food; either hoarding or refusing

*Concerned with details but ignoring main issues

*Few or no long term friends; tend to be loners

*Attitude of entitlement or self importance

*Sneaks things without permission even if she/he could have them by asking

*Triangulation of adults; pitting one against the other

*A darkness behind eyes when raging

*Parents appear to be overcontrolling

Monday, February 8, 2010

Love this crew...


Thank you Johanna for our family pic. Lucy Grace was looking at the camera! That's a first and a reason to be happy. She's come along way. I'm so excited about watching her grow up. The others are so grown I can hardly stand it. Where has the time gone? And of course...there's Greg- the B.E.S.T man alive. For real- He is such a great dad and husband. I am so excited about this year and all that it holds. We had to get a new pic taken for a family camp that Greg will be speaking at this summer. SO looking forward to going with the girls...they are super excited. Can you believe that I have never been to Colorado? We are also going to Mississippi in May to see my brother, Bill and his family. This is going to be great.
Alot to look forward to and good people to do it with.

Sunday, February 7, 2010

This is weird...


Abby is going to the orthodontist tomorrow. I know that some of you have already experienced this...but it's new to me. i feel like i am entering the next phase and i am feeling "a little verklempt". she will be going to the same orthodontist that i went to, in the exact same office. i am interested to see if it smells the same. she is really excited. $4000 worth of excitement.

Thursday, February 4, 2010

Looking back at old post...

i have been going back through some of my original post from a couple of years ago. i ran across this and had to share it - SO funny- it was from the end of 1st grade or the beginning of 2nd grade (Abby) :

"I thought that I would, again, share with you the paragraph that Abby wrote. She went to Christi's house one day for "school" and I asked her to give Abby the first sentence and to have her do some "free" writing....Here's what we got-

"One morning I took my favorite stuffed animals outside for tea. I said, 'Would you like some tea?' But no one answered. So I asked again. But everyone was quiet. Then I yelled at my stuffed animals and everyone said, 'Yes.' "

So...for those of you who want to homeschool because you want your kids to have great memories of what a patient & kind mother you must have been...sacrificial and self-less....never answering in a harsh tone...

Rethink it.

What I started reading today-


Tuesday, February 2, 2010

Monday, February 1, 2010

Ellen Carol


Ellie will be 8 years old on President's Day. I say that because school is out. Ellie thinks that she is out of school because it is her birthday! When I went into see my OBGYN the week prior to Ellie's birth she tried to schedule my c-section on the 14th. Me, being the girl that I am, insisted that it be the day after. I remember growing up. Just in case she had a sad Valentine's Day- I wanted her to have the next day to look forward to. Not knowing then what I know now -that I would have 4 girls- I am glad that there is always a party to look forward to! :)
Ellie is such a soft place for me to rest. She is an easy, quiet, content little girl. She is happy to sit in a chair with me all day. As long as I am holding her the world can pass way. She loves us so much and that is a satisfaction that I can feel. It is almost tangible. Ellie is such a joy to me. She softens my heart so quickly! What a gift from God she is to our entire family. Thank you Lord for the gift of Ellie!