The Prayer of St Francis

"Lord, make me an instrument of your peace;
where there is hatred, let me sow love;
where there is injury, pardon:
where there is doubt, faith ;
where there is despair, hope
where there is darkness, light
where there is sadness, joy
O Divine Master,
grant that I may not so much seek to be consoled as to console;
to be understood, as to understand;
to be loved, as to love;
for it is in giving that we receive,
it is in pardoning that we are pardoned,
and it is in dying that we are born to Eternal Life.
Amen."

Over the past month this prayer has been written in our order of worship...we have also been saying it together in our family worship times. I like to say this prayer for obvious reasons. It cuts against the grain of all that comes natural to me. It has convicted me and produced greater focus in my life. I am a very active person. The flow of people in and out of my home is not something that I begrudge. Actually, it invigorates me. Greg and I have often talked about how we feel that having people in our home has helped our marriage. There are times that while we are in dialogue with others we are hearing each other express thoughts that maybe we weren't understanding when it was just us trying to "discuss" a topic. I have often said, "We're going to give our lives for something- it might as well be people and relationships!" However, when saying this prayer- my eyes have been opened to something...the first sentence.
"Lord, Make me an instrument of your peace."
I am always surprised by the way I can hear things 1000 times and then one day - it is deafening.
I went to buy a dress today. I have two weddings to go to in May. One wedding is in the evening and one is in the afternoon. I have a good friend who is trying to "dress" me for the occasion. All who know me know that I am a fairly "comfortable" dressing individual. So when the time came for this decision to be made- my only input was "I have to look like I didn't try." I hate flashing back to elementary school when my dark jeans with the red balloons on the pockets, matched my red belt and red socks as well as the red ribbons in my pig tails. It was too matchy-matchy. I felt like a K-Mart girl. Like I bought it all as a set from K-Mart. So, that is basically my fashion criteria...it just has to look like I didn't try too hard to make it work and no matching "sets".
In the Gospel of Matthew, we are told "You are the Light." "You are the Salt." Light and Salt? Of all of the great things on the earth that the Creator could've chosen- why these two?
In my estimation - they are natural change agents. They are things that do not have to try. They do their job by being what they were created to be. No thought, No trying, No mouth for talking...just being. Of all the things that HE could have dreamed up to instruct US -it was two objects that exert NO effort at all. They cannot make themselves morph into something else. They cannot appear to be something else. They're just salt & light.
"Lord, MAKE ME an instrument of your peace."
I must admit- I am not sure what this is. I think it is someone who seeks to live in such a way that they right wrongs. I believe that it is someone who lives in such a way that they bring order to chaos. I hope that I am someone that looks for ways to encourage others rather than making them feel stupid. I pray that I can live without so that others might have. Fostering peace, being an "instrument of peace" is something transformational. It is not something that I can just make happen. I tried to be a vegetarian one time...and no lie- at noon I was on the phone with a friend telling her that I had decided to be one and "had started this morning"...and while I was talking to her I was eating a hamburger...I had completely FORGOTTEN! and made a big 'ol side of beef for lunch! That is the honest truth.
"Lord, MAKE ME...
an instrument of your peace."
That is my prayer.